diff --git a/Themes/_fallback/Scripts/03 ProductivityHelpers.lua b/Themes/_fallback/Scripts/03 ProductivityHelpers.lua
index 2fb7c704b9..d8a719a7dc 100644
--- a/Themes/_fallback/Scripts/03 ProductivityHelpers.lua	
+++ b/Themes/_fallback/Scripts/03 ProductivityHelpers.lua	
@@ -24,18 +24,49 @@ Health = {
 }
 
 -- Make graphics their true size at any resolution.
+--[[
+	Note: for screens taller than wide (i.e. phones, sideways displays),
+	you'll need to get width rather than height (I just don't feel like
+	uglyfying my code just to handle rare cases). -shake
+--]]
+
 function Actor:Real()
 	-- normal
 	local theme = THEME:GetMetric("Common","ScreenHeight")
 	local res = PREFSMAN:GetPreference("DisplayHeight")
-	
+
 	-- scale back down to real pixels.
 	self:basezoom(theme/res)
-	
+
 	-- don't make this ugly
 	self:SetTextureFiltering(false)
 end
 
+-- Scale things back up after they have already been scaled down.
+function Actor:RealInverse()
+	-- normal
+	local theme = THEME:GetMetric("Common","ScreenHeight")
+	local res = PREFSMAN:GetPreference("DisplayHeight")
+
+	-- scale back up to theme resolution
+	self:basezoom(res/theme)
+
+	self:SetTextureFiltering(true)
+end
+
+-- useful
+function GetReal()
+	local theme = THEME:GetMetric("Common","ScreenHeight")
+	local res = PREFSMAN:GetPreference("DisplayHeight")
+	return theme/res
+end
+
+function GetRealInverse()
+	local theme = THEME:GetMetric("Common","ScreenHeight")
+	local res = PREFSMAN:GetPreference("DisplayHeight")
+	return res/theme
+end
+
 --[[ Actor commands ]]
 function Actor:CenterX()
 	self:x(SCREEN_CENTER_X)